“Here’s the truth”. I’ve been saying that a lot lately. And usually it’s been followed by fall on the floor laughter. Mostly because I’ve just reached a point in my life where there’s no keeping it in. Not for shocked looks, nasty whispers or unwanted judgements.
So here it is. I’ve been dating and making out all over the show. That’s right. From park benches and cosy restaurants to arty theatres and long piers. From Belgian, American and French to Mexican, Japanese and Italian.
And I see you giving me the side-eye now. Yes you.
Don’t pull out the good book yet, I haven’t dropped my panties but I’m not holding back either.
Simply because there’s no reason to.
I’m love-struck. Love-struck over the freedom I feel in the arms of my future potential lover. Let’s be clear, they’re not safe or warm or cuddly, but they are completely uninhibited. They feel like they’re saying, “God bless you girl, you do you, any way, any how, any want.”
Be expressive. Be unique. Be purple in the face of green.
And you see this in the ancient fossil wearing her black leathers or the peacock prancing in his platform heels or even the ‘girl-next-door’ with her bright orange hair.
And you hear this in the boom box conversation on the bus or in the New Yorker stories from the neighbour or in the cussing of the pissed off cyclist.
And you smell it in the aroma of old dog’s pee on the streets.
For this is not a traditional love story. This is a Gotham city kinda love story.
And at the heart of this story is freedom… this is ‘New York, concrete jungle where dreams are made of and where there’s nothing you can’t do’.
But like any great love it can suck you in, get you naked, love you up and spit you out.
This is for the brave, the crazy and the resilient.
This is for the ‘all in’ otherwise you’ll find yourself ‘all out’. This is for those who want to take a gulp out of a life and not a sip.
This is for those who know when to put on the blinkers, the ear phones and the protection and when to be like Eve.
Because when you fall prey to the seduction: the bright lights, flashy bulbs and limelight; the flattery and the false promises; the casual rather than the committed, the fall is long, hollow and hard.
It’ll leave you broke and broken.
This is the hard-knock kind of love. The kind that takes most of your time and energy and requires intense work.
It’s also the kind that needs you to dig deeper for the softer parts. For the downtime and for the quiet.
Whether it’s a walk on the Highline, kayaking on the Hudson, a nap in Prospect Park or a visit to the Met, there’s another side to be found and experienced, just like all great lovers.
And don’t we all want to say that we’ve had at least one great lover in our lives?
I’m 35, never been married and have no kids. I’m single and no, not desperate. I’m at a point in my life where most people are wondering when I’m gonna settle down. They don’t even have to say it, I can sense it.
But I don’t want to settle.
I want to be purple in the face of green.
I want to rock my black leathers and red lipstick. I want to prance in my platforms and I want bright orange hair.
Heck, I want to rip all my clothes off and skinny dip under the moonlight. I want to have mad, passionate sex. And, if we gonna be honest I want to have an orgasm too.
I want to fall madly in love.
Madly. In. Love
The only way to do that is to take a risk and allow myself to be vulnerable.
Maybe I’ve been infected by the madness of this city already. But who cares? I’m love struck. I’m talking crazy and I love it.
I’ve already proven in my choices that I’m not afraid to take risks. Can I be vulnerable though?
One thing’s for sure, I’ve been sucked in.
How far or for how long? Mmm, only time will tell.
P.S For more on #L&LtakeNYC visit LeanneTee